cicer

So, wow. The Muses are really giving it to my this week. Apparently they only agree to be helpful (in other words, actually let me write anything) if they can annoy the heck out of me while the do it. WTF, Muses. That's not really being helpful. The following is a conversation I found myself having with the little writing gremlins that live inside my head. I'm not as crazy as I sound, really. Probbably. Maybe.

393 Muse: HI.

Me: No. No, no, no.

393 Muse: I LOVE YOU PLEASE WRITE ME.

Me: No. I don't have time. Go away.

393 Muse: WHY WON'T YOU LOVE ME AND GIVE ME A HOME.

Me: You are not on the Schedule. Remember the Schedule? Where I made that big plan of what I was going to write over the next few months, to maximize my Writerly Potential and organize all the bunnies living in my head? Remember that?

393 Muse:...LOVE ME.

Me: NO. You were being cranky the day I made the Schedule. You weren't cooperating. So you got stuck way at the bottom of the priority list. Deal with it.

393 Muse:...Look, one half of my pairing is Sanzo. What do you want from me?

Me: It's not my fault that Hakkai and Gojyo are so much more coopertive.

393 Muse: *smugly* Usually.

Me:...Yeah, okay, they've kind of abandoned me right now.

393 Muse: *even more smugly* Because you made them fight. And you made Gojyo sleep with someone else. So they're not talking to you right now, are they?

Me: *sulkily* No.

393 Muse: *if I were any more smug, I would implode* In fact, it looks like I'm the only Muse talking to you right now, doesn't it?

Me: *looks around suddenly desolate mindscape* Dammit.

393 Muse: Well. Except for that. *gestures to tiny crazed rabid bunny gnawing determinedly at the Writer's ankle*

Me: Oh, that? That's not a muse. That's the Spawn of Satan, also known as the Camp Fuck You Die bunny. Ignore him, maybe he'll go away.

393 Muse: ...WRITE ME I LOVE YOU?

Me:...I think about it.

393 Muse: SCORE!

Me: *headdesks* Pwned once again.